Chapter 1: Girl and Ape
Frog was mad at Girl. He hopped away from her, and her friends, very angrily. Frog wasn’t about to be part of this conversation. Ox spoke to Frog, insulting him, slandering the name of his father. Frog stormed away as Girl was left with Ox and Ape; two very unpleasant ‘friends.’ Ape was the worst friend, thought Girl, watching her sit there, hunched over, and giggling at Frog’s expense. Ox giggled in unison with Ape, they high-fived, and danced around in a circle, punching one another in the arm.
“Come on,” said Girl. “Just stop, okay?”
“No,” replied Ox. “Now let’s call him fat. Hey Frog! Did you eat too many fatty flies? You are so fucking FAT, Frog!”
Ox yowled with laughter.
Hopping away, Frog pretended not to care. Girl felt bad for Frog, but she also felt he deserved it. Frog was quite meddlesome in her affairs. He gossiped too much and wasn’t any friendlier to Girl than Ox or Ape. He followed Girl around, poking fun at her, berating absolutely everything she did. Frog was no real friend of Girl’s. And as for Girl and Ape? Were they friends? Or were they the same creature, rolled up into one?
Ox was too attached to Ape. She followed Ape’s every move, copying her ill behavior. And Ape, well, Ape wasn’t interested in pleasing anyone but herself. Often at times Ape sat alone in her tree, ignoring Girl’s knock at the trunk. And even more often at times she sent a Tree Snake to inform Girl that she was too busy to greet visitors. The Tree Snake, regrettably, was forced to tell Girl to “piss off.” Ape’s words, not the Tree Snake’s. Girl knew the Tree Snake didn’t agree with it, but he had to do as Ape requested.
“Piss off…” he said reluctantly. “Ape is too busy with her toys.”
Oh, Ape and her toys. How she loved her toys. They were very expensive toys, from a very expensive tree, made of very expensive bark, some dressed in very expensive decor. Ape cared more for her toys than she did for any living creature in the world – especially Tree Snakes.
And she made that quite clear.
Now, before you judge Girl for choosing to be close to Ape, understand that she was Lonely. When Girl’s Loneliness got the best of her, she abandoned all logic. Any friendship with Ape was an obvious abandonment of logic and dignity – an excusable act of desperation. Ape was tolerable when she was in a good mood. The problem was that her good moods were few and far between. She was a generally miserable creature, one that had extreme mood swings. One might think that Ape had two different personalities. But her nicer half was buried so deep that she was routinely unpleasant. Ape was rude. And her resentment for Girl was not executed sloppily. Ape thought long and hard about the games she wanted to play. And the only games she played with Girl were Mind Games.
Sometimes it was as though Ape was merely inside of Girl’s mind and they were one being…
“I’ll give you up! Shut you down! Aren’t we friends? If you were mine, you would agree!” These were the typical statements of Ape.
The Mind Games happened one too many times for Girl. And Girl was not a toy. She could not be possessed. Girl was a Girl. And Ape was, well, just an Ape. Truthfully, Apes should not convince themselves that they have any superiority over Girls. But often times, many Girls can become Apes. So this was a tricky endeavor indeed.
One day, Ape heard Girl striking up a conversation with another friend.
“Who are you speaking with?” demanded Ape, jumping down from a tree not far from where Girl stood. Girl was, inarguably, hanging out with a Cock. And let me inform you, dear readers, that Cock wasn’t all he was cracked up to be. But we will discuss that later.
“I was talking to a Cock. But you scared him off. He is gone now,” answered Girl.
“No, no,” corrected Girl. “Not that kind of cock. Like a Rooster. But he goes by ‘Cock’, probably because he wants to make that lewd connection to his name.”
“Well…” replied Ape. “Cock sounds like a moron.”
Ape was correct. Cock really was a moron. However, Ape had no basis for jumping to this conclusion – she hadn’t even met Cock. He was off somewhere, most likely chasing down a mosquito.
“Well,” said Girl, “he’s not. And that is very rude.”
Though, in her mind, Girl silently agreed with Ape. Cock was a complete moron. Again, Girl’s judgment was clouded by Loneliness.
“Since when, little Girl, have I ever been polite – especially to your friends?” snapped Ape.
This was indeed true. Ape was impolite to every friend of Girl’s.
“Never,” replied Girl. “But…”
“But you know what, Ape? I am tired of this. I am tired of you. I do not want you anymore. Get out of my head! You do not make the Loneliness go away. You make the Loneliness more beautiful.”
And Ape, as proud as she was, replied, “Well that’s perfect! Because I was getting tired of you first. I had already decided – just a few moments before you opened your hideous mouth – that I didn’t want you. Do you know what that means?”
“No,” answered Girl.
“It means you are stupid and slow.”
Girl shook her head and admit, “Yes, it must have been your idea, not mine.”
Ape laughed at Girl. She said that she cared not and disappeared through the trees – like any Ape would do.
And Girl felt Loneliness once more. At that moment, the only creature to turn to was Cock – the moron.
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Chapters 1 through 17 (updates are ongoing)